Épater les Bourgeois
by WinterSky101
Summary: A typical meeting for Les Amis de l'ABC.


**This was originally written a few years ago as part of a school assignment on Victor Hugo. (To give some perspective on how old it is, the Les Amis meeting was originally about the Euromaidan protests in Ukraine.) I dug it up recently, did some editing, and here we are.**

 **The phrase "épater les bourgeois" means "to shock the middle class." It was the rallying cry of the French Decadents in the late 19th century. The concept seemed to suit Les Amis.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Les Mis.**

* * *

The first to arrive at the meeting at Café Musain was Enjolras. That wasn't uncommon. Enjolras was normally the first to arrive, sometimes accompanied by Combeferre. The dish-washer of the café, Mme Louison, knew them all by that point and greeted Enjolras by name.

"How late do you think your meeting will last tonight?" she asked, wiping her hands on her apron. Enjolras barely looked up from his computer as he replied.

"I'm not sure. It depends on how long our discussion lasts." Mme Louison huffed and disappeared into the kitchen. Enjolras barely noticed.

"That wasn't very polite," a mild voice remarked. Enjolras did look up that time, as Combeferre and Courfeyrac entered the café. It was Combeferre who had spoken, unsurprisingly; he was always trying to subtly push Enjolras to be more civil.

"And we shouldn't go on too late," Courfeyrac added. "Feuilly is working tomorrow morning, and Jehan has to catch a plane to Provence at eight."

"I was thinking we could speak about our upcoming rally," Enjolras replied. "I suppose we can always continue the discussion at our next meeting if necessary."

"Ooh, I was hoping we'd talk about the rally," Courfeyrac stated, grinning. "Grantaire was telling me what he thought about it yesterday, and I want to know what you would say in response."

Enjolras bristled. "I can't imagine what Grantaire would say about it, as I doubt he even cares enough to think about it," he stated in a mildly disgusted tone. Combeferre arched an eyebrow.

"Grantaire knows a lot about our rallies," he remarked. "Perhaps he doesn't feel as strongly about it as you do, but he does keep up with them."

Enjolras wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. He was spared by the entrance of Joly, Bossuet, and Musichetta. As usual, Joly and Bossuet went to sit down and Musichetta went up to get their drinks; as an employee of the café, she could get a discount. When she sat down in the middle of Joly and Bossuet, holding both their drinks, the two men pressed kisses onto her cheeks in perfect synchronization.

"Enjolras!" Bossuet called with a smile. "What are we going to be talking about tonight?"

"I might have to leave early," Joly added, looking a bit anxious. "I have a headache and I'm a little worried that it might actually be an early symptom of lupus-"

"You don't have lupus, Joly," Musichetta and Bossuet groaned in tandem. "Listen to me," Musichetta added, taking Joly's arm and forcing him to look at her. Enjolras tuned out their conversation; whatever Musichetta and Bossuet were going to say to Joly to draw him out of his hypochondria, Enjolras probably wasn't really invited to listen in on it.

Jehan's entrance was a welcome distraction. "I brought Marius!" xe called, pulling xyr roommate into the room. Courfeyrac's face immediately lit up.

"Marius!" he cried. "I haven't seen you in _days_!"

"We were in a class together yesterday-" Marius tried to interject, but Courfeyrac didn't allow it.

"Tell me _everything_ ," he instructed Marius firmly, getting up and dragging him over to a corner table. "I want to hear about what you did over the summer!"

"But we spent half of the summer together," Marius was protesting half-heartedly as Courfeyrac sat him down firmly. Jehan grinned.

"You'd think that Marius would be used to Courfeyrac's ridiculousness, considering they roomed together all of last year."

"Can anyone get used to Courfeyrac's ridiculousness?" Combeferre asked rhetorically. "I room with him now, and I've known him since seventh grade, and I was _still_ surprised the first time he started singing duets with himself in the shower."

"He sings duets with himself in the shower?" Jehan asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise. "Then again, he's definitely that sort of person."

"Who's what sort of person?" Feuilly asked, sitting down next to Jehan. Enjolras hadn't even noticed him come in. Bahorel had apparently entered with him; he was sitting with Joly, Bossuet, and Musichetta.

"Courfeyrac's the sort of person to sing duets with himself in the shower," Jehan told Feuilly, who nodded after a moment.

"I can definitely see it."

Enjolras looked up at the clock. It was five minutes past nine. "Late again," he muttered to himself, wondering when Grantaire would deign to show up.

"Oh, Grantaire told me he might be late to the meeting," Feuilly told Enjolras, turning to him. "Something about an art project that he was in the middle of working on. He said we should start without him if he weren't here on time." Enjolras pursed his lips, but said nothing.

"Anyway, we're still waiting on Éponine and her friend Cosette," Combeferre added. "They're late as well."

As if on cue, Éponine and a blonde girl who had to be Cosette entered the café. "Sorry we're late!" Éponine called. "Cosette's dinner with her dad ran late."

"I'm so sorry I'm late to my first meeting," Cosette added. In his peripheral vision, Enjolras saw Marius sit bolt upright. "But my father wanted to ask me about my classes and time got away from us."

"That's quite alright-" Enjolras was beginning to say, but Marius cut him off.

"It's you," he whispered. Cosette turned to him with a quizzical look on her face, which quickly melted into shock.

"It's you," she repeated back to Marius in an equally stunned voice. Enjolras hoped he wasn't the only one that was completely lost.

"Do you two know each other?" Éponine asked cautiously, proving that Enjolras was not alone in his confusion. "Cosette, I thought you hadn't met any of Les Amis. And Marius, I _told_ you about Cosette, and you said you'd never met her."

"Cosette," Marius breathed, savoring the name on his tongue. "Your name is Cosette."

"And yours is Marius," Cosette whispered back. Enjolras met Courfeyrac's eyes; if anyone would know what was going on, it would be Marius' self-professed best friend. But Courfeyrac just shrugged, admitting that he was just as lost as the rest of them.

"Shall we do introductions?" Enjolras asked in a voice that was probably a bit louder than necessary. Cosette and Marius both jumped.

"Enjolras, it's the girl!" Marius cried. Enjolras had no idea what that meant, but evidently Courfeyrac did.

" _The_ girl?" he asked. "The one that you wouldn't stop talking about even though you only saw her once?"

"You talked about me to your friends?" Cosette asked, sounding far more flattered than she should have about the borderline-stalker behavior.

"I tried to find out who you were, but no one knew," Marius apologized.

"Well, the description you gave was 'a blonde girl that looked like an angel,'" Éponine mentioned in a slightly surly voice. "How were we to know who you meant?"

"Éponine, you brought us together!" Marius cried, gathering Éponine up in a huge hug. He spun her in a circle once before putting her down and turning back to Cosette. "And now before me is the light of my life."

Cosette blushed and extended a hand to Marius. "Shall we get to know each other a bit better?" she asked. "After the meeting, of course." Marius stared at Cosette's hand as if he weren't quite sure what it was, but after a few moments he accepted it.

"I would love to." Marius and Cosette sat down next to each other at a little table. Looking slightly stunned by the chain of events, and with an expression her face Enjolras couldn't quite place, Éponine went over and sat with Joly, Bossuet, and Musichetta. Courfeyrac returned to the front of the room. Enjolras scanned the café. Everyone was there except for Grantaire.

"Should we wait for Grantaire?" he asked, unsure of whether or not he wanted to do so. Feuilly shook his head.

"He said we shouldn't," he replied. "Just start the meeting."

"Alright." Enjolras shuffled his papers and was about to stand and start speaking when the door to the Musain opened again. This time, it was Grantaire that entered. His clothes were entirely splattered in paint, verifying Feuilly's art project excuse. Even his hair hadn't been spared; there were flecks of red and gold paint caught in his dark curls.

"Sorry I'm late, Apollo," Grantaire called up to Enjolras, who bristled at the nickname, as usual. "Art project," he added unnecessarily.

"We haven't started yet," Enjolras replied in a civil voice. Grantaire pressed a hand to his heart with a gasp.

"You waited for me? Oh, Apollo, I'm touched!"

"Be serious, Grantaire," Enjolras sighed, which was a common phrase during the meetings of Les Amis.

"I am wild," Grantaire replied with a wink. He threw himself into a seat next to Bossuet, accepting a beer from Musichetta that Enjolras hadn't noticed before that point. Grantaire took a careless swig from it as he gestured for Enjolras to begin speaking. Pursing his lips, Enjolras did just that.

"I was thinking we could discuss the upcoming LGBTQA rally," he stated, carefully not looking at Grantaire. "Unless anyone has anything else they'd like to speak about, of course." There were no objections, so Enjolras continued. "Combeferre is going to give a quick overview, in case anyone needs it. Then I'd like to talk about some of the more specific plans, so we know what everyone's going to be doing."

"It's a simple rally," Combeferre stated, stepping forward. "People are going to gather in front of the town hall. There will be a few prewritten speeches, then the people in charge of the rally have decided to allow unprepared speeches to be performed. After that, people will hopefully go to the stands and some volunteers will go up to answer questions on a personal basis."

"Any questions?" Enjolras asked.

"What's your opinion on the idea to allow unprepared speeches at the rally?" Grantaire called out. Enjolras gritted his teeth.

"What was that, Grantaire?" he asked. Looking far too pleased with himself, Grantaire repeated the question.

"What do you think of the idea to allow unprepared speeches?" he repeated. He must have noticed the face Enjolras made when Combeferre mentioned it. "Isn't it a good thing to let everyone be able to speak?"

"I have nothing against the idea itself," Enjolras replied coldly. "Clearly, anyone who feels strongly about this should be allowed to speak."

"And what do you think about the speeches being completely uncensored? Doesn't that mean people could say hurtful things?" Grantaire asked. Enjolras bit back the harsh comment he wanted to make and instead came up with a slightly more civil response.

"I don't know why people would go through all that effort," he replied in a carefully even voice. Grantaire laughed.

"Cause people suck," he replied. "But freedom of speech, right? Everyone can say whatever they want."

"If people really feel that way, they should be able to express their opinions," Enjolras replied, the words tasting bitter in his mouth. "However, an LGBTQA rally is not the right place to do it."

"But shouldn't the opposing side be allowed to voice their points?" Grantaire argued. Enjolras glared.

"Do you enjoy playing devil's advocate?" he demanded. "I know you don't believe these things. I know that you care for LGBTQA rights as much as any of the rest of us. And I know that you are merely saying these things to irritate me. If you could refrain from being needlessly obnoxious so the rest of us could get back to what we're doing, it would be much appreciated."

"What fine marble," Grantaire replied with a sigh, the non sequitur making Enjolras frown. "Go back to what you were saying, Enjolras," Grantaire added. "From now on, I will attempt to keep my comments to myself."

"The effort would be appreciated," Enjolras replied stiffly. He was about to continue with his discussion when Jehan shyly stood.

"I have to leave," xe admitted, checking the clock. "I have an early flight tomorrow. I'm sorry."

"I should probably leave as well," Feuilly admitted, standing as well. "I have work tomorrow morning."

"Of course," Enjolras replied. He could see from the way the group was acting that the meeting was finished; his argument with Grantaire had destroyed any concentration they had. "Why don't we finish up for today, and perhaps we can talk more about the rally another time."

"I'm sorry I have to leave," Jehan apologized again. Enjolras waved it off.

"Have a nice time in Provence, Jehan," he replied. As he sat down, all the others began to disperse; Grantaire went to get another beer, Courfeyrac turned to Combeferre and started talking to him about something, Marius and Cosette reclaimed their more private table and began to talk to each other, and all of the others began to chat as well. Enjolras sighed as he opened up his computer to continue planning the rally.

Yes, Les Amis de l'ABC could be childish sometimes, and they could be exasperating on occasion, but Enjolras wouldn't trade his friends for the world.


End file.
